Paper-cut Prone
Lawyers need secretarial staff for many reasons, but lawyers in Las Vegas can add one more reason to the list: AVOIDING PAPER CUTS.
Las Vegas is a horrendously dry place. It’s oft-compared to being baked alive in a convection oven, at least when summer rolls around. This unique environment leads to dry skin. Skin so dry you can’t keep it moist, even with a generous slathering of lotion every few hours.
Lawyers work with a lot of paper. It’s the nature of the job. Reading, drafting, pushing papers around your desk like George Constanza, it just comes with the territory. Unless you’re one of those paperless firms, straining its worker bees’ compound eyes staring at computer screens all day. Your eyes strain from the effort at focusing, because a computer screen is just a flashing light and one shouldn’t stare into flashing lights for long periods of time, but I digress….
The dry skin, the large volumes of paper, the need to do things fast, it’s the trifecta for paper cuts. Paper cuts in awkward places, impossible to place a bandaid on without retarding your efficiency, leaving little blood streaks on your work, justifying the use of cliches like “my BLOOD, sweat and tears” in open court.
How can a lawyer avoid these damned papercuts in Las Vegas? That’s where secretarial staff comes in. Offload the paper to the secretary. Stuffing envelopes creases your fingers? Why, that’s perfect secretarial work.
So the next time you run into your staff, thank them. They’re your first line of defense against paper cuts. Oh, and don’t forget to add bandaids to the supply order.
You know you’ll need them.
